Friday, July 24, 2009

lessons of life

my mom didnt relent even before the penultimate day i was leaving for iitr.i find her a bit too sadistic for a mom but she is a mom nevertheless.Everyday she used to allow me to sleep till nine o clock summoning all her motherly affection to make sure i wasnt disturbed by my vociferous dad and sis who are getting ready for work.even after that she never woke me up ,at least not in the traditional throwing water on the face style.she just use to push the curtain asideand let sunrays filter through the window mesh.i have always loved reading poetry and prose about the early morning sun knocking at doors and making crowing cocks bersek.but in delhi summers, a more apt description of the soft sunrays(at 9 o clock) could be obtained from the accounts of survivours of hiroshima nagasaki about little boys and fat men.having just read exodus and watched the pianist i cudnt help myself relating to the third degree torcher in aushwitz.to top it up,my mom placed my breakfast(idli,4 peices) and glass of milk besides me on the table wich such thunderous clanking that i felt like being killed and then buried and demurely alive at the same time(schrodinger's man).even if died after waking up like this i wud have to drag my dead body to the washroom(where these days i am trying to perform my abultions as prescribed herehttp://www.sulabhtoiletmuseum.org/fact.htm ) as i hate my food cold above all(even above supersonic booms and solar flares in my eyes).sorry for the blasphemous overblown allusions and metaphors but believe me u honestly wudnt want a morning to start anyway like that.
lesson one:women and elephant never forget.and when the lady in question is ur mum.....god forbid)
the journey was not arduous,when it started.the green fields looked elegantly beautiful.but 8 hours and a bus,tempo,car lift and rickshaw ride later i wasn't in my pleasantest of moods.but the serene campus coupled with a pleasant weather tripled with the absence of the vast flow of humanity elevated the flagging me .while i was fumbling my pockets for some non existent change and making non commital actions about the issue to the equally non commital rickshaw guy who seemed totally convinced that it was solely my ethical, moral, social and religious duty to find, borrow, beg and perform other manegirial actions to get the elusive change .in walks, an arbit matka guy with the happiest smile running over his face from pole to pole.he seemed much more concerned than either of us at the audacious challenge of the issue offered.i promptly asked him if he had change for 100 rs as i had been to various other people who heroically backed off after profuse apoligies.but his guy asked how much was actually to be paid, took out rs 30 which was the actual amount the squatting rickshaw puller (whose languid behaviour was very appaling with his money at stake)remembered with some difficulty and paid him with such satisfaction that i felt worse than the poorest of beggars.when i tried to recover myself and my lost pride by asking him his name and room number,he just waved me off bestowing a majestic grin on the rickshaw puller who was now a picture of alertness and was watching me with weary respect and apprehension.he probably thut i had the exemplary capacity to bewitch unwary strangers into giving me green and thus promptly fled from the spot.
lesson two:
sleeping on a reading room table in my vests and shorts would never get me the blessings of godess saraswati.but it got me three hours of sleep,refuge from mutant millitant mosquitoes and the sweet breeze of a fan in powerless r land where breeze stood still like a painted main building upon a painted campus.of course when i woke up and craned my neck i felt i had dislocated my entire body.but then,looking at people sleeping blissfully on tables so unabashedly at a place where mid night oil is burnt to conquer the bewithcing lady sleep(i love using lady luck and sleep.....these two prove that there is still hope in this gender biased english language where men conviniently account for the entire human race) and being a part of this prepostorous crime is something i will always cherish in my life.
lesson 3:its better to lose health like a spendthrift than to waste it like a miser.
when a great person whose singing talents will make a eudynamys scolopacea blush(euphemism for put to shame) called me and informed that my facebook profile was going all wierd.........the coffee of ccd drained away from my oesophagus like the blood from my head.to asses the impact of the damage i asked here what all eccentricity was going go in response to which she dutifully read all my latest posts from my hacked account stopping at a point where i instinctively realised no amount of cajoling will make her read further.i dont like getting myself insulted except for a cause extraordinaire like saving a life or something of this sort.but even then i dont think i will write on a social net working site about my orientations incorrect.
lesson 4:there is a lull before storm .but then after winter cometh spring again.its love,forgiveness and friendship that make life worth living actually.



ps:e e cunninghams found me as his latest follower.
pps:i promise i wont ever write like this again .its just the circumstances which are making me seek for an outlet .do bear with me.
ppps:this world will be a better(silent) place if people dont discuss about time travel.




7 comments:

  1. Lol.. Nice post Akhilesh! Really neat!
    PS: It's torture, not 'torcher'.
    :)

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  2. Had you taken the response to your 'what is the apt frequency of blogging' question seriously, you probably could have made this a number of posts! Whew... But then again, the writer's wish. Nice post btw.

    We all empathize with your recent FB mishaps; after all, whose profile has never been hacked? But I must say - this guy had style!

    And remove Word Verification!

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  3. But for the life of me, I cannot imagine who would want to screw with good old PSR. We are all with you man. Death to the hackers!

    And Kondy is spot on when he says you should have made this a number of posts instead of one. Think about it.

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  4. You, too, have this uncanny ability to encircle some brilliant lines with some very ordinary ones, not to mention the eye-pinching formatting. And, length is no bother. And, seriously, you pretty sure girls don't read your blog? That link could have been at least hyperlinked ra.

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  5. hey that library night is really one of the weirdest things to have happened to us...isn't it??

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  6. glaring grammatical mistakes here and there,(sorry, i can't really overlook them, especially so when committed by others!) which speaks of the callousness behind the exercise. but the ostentatious use (over use, rather) makes up for it to some extent. however, i strongly second 'lesson one'!

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  7. Just one thing that can make you the next big thing in the writing world : Press shift while you type on the next letter after the full stop.

    ReplyDelete